A Couple More Things this Mom has done right
In case you missed the First Three, you can find read them Here - 6 Things (Part 1)
cause I love my overwhelmed-or-menopausal-or-ADD friends
cause we just can't handle too much at a time
4. Compared children all the while embracing the Label .... whoa!!!
In case you missed the First Three, you can find read them Here - 6 Things (Part 1)
Just a couple more1. Inappropriate laughter...
2. Happily made my children truant...
3. Said I was sorry over and over...
cause I love my overwhelmed-or-menopausal-or-ADD friends
cause we just can't handle too much at a time
4. Compared children all the while embracing the Label .... whoa!!!
I’m not talking about comparisons like you’re nothing like your sister.
Or, your brother never did that. What's your problem?
(That’s just rude, stupid Mr. High School Teacher.)
I am talking about watching my 3rd and 4th navigate stairs.
Or, your brother never did that. What's your problem?
(That’s just rude, stupid Mr. High School Teacher.)
As simple as that.
I realized #3 wasn’t walking up stairs as well as #4. He was older and was seemingly healthy. Seeing him walking on his toes or needing to use his hands to tear up those stairs. It just didn’t make sense. I wouldn’t have noticed it without comparison because, man was he a fast one.
But when I’d watch them race up, side by side.
Some Thing was off, the development wasn't the same.
It was hard day
The day I heard the diagnosis of (very slight) cerebral palsy.
Truth.
Didn't even see that coming.
But without eyes on them, comparing them, seeing the usually-beautiful-sometimes-agonizing differences.
Without me seeing it, I know the neurology referral would have happened a lot later.
And having that initial neurology consult has helped pave a pathway to other care.
And other diagnoses - and Labels.
I know. They're all precious in His sight and amazing human beings.
I know that sickness or differences don't necessarily define us.
But they have been born into a world, a broken screwed up world with disease, sickness, sin, disability, trauma, neglect and abandonment.
It's the truth and we can't change that.
Don't run from what is in front of you.
Look for Labels, be open to diagnosis if it's needed.
Don't be afraid of imperfection ... because perfect kids.
That Label is just not fair.
I realized #3 wasn’t walking up stairs as well as #4. He was older and was seemingly healthy. Seeing him walking on his toes or needing to use his hands to tear up those stairs. It just didn’t make sense. I wouldn’t have noticed it without comparison because, man was he a fast one.
But when I’d watch them race up, side by side.
Some Thing was off, the development wasn't the same.
It was hard day
The day I heard the diagnosis of (very slight) cerebral palsy.
Truth.
Didn't even see that coming.
But without eyes on them, comparing them, seeing the usually-beautiful-sometimes-agonizing differences.
Without me seeing it, I know the neurology referral would have happened a lot later.
And having that initial neurology consult has helped pave a pathway to other care.
And other diagnoses - and Labels.
I know. They're all precious in His sight and amazing human beings.
I know that sickness or differences don't necessarily define us.
But they have been born into a world, a broken screwed up world with disease, sickness, sin, disability, trauma, neglect and abandonment.
It's the truth and we can't change that.
Don't run from what is in front of you.
Look for Labels, be open to diagnosis if it's needed.
Don't be afraid of imperfection ... because perfect kids.
That Label is just not fair.
5. I've Never been afraid of the Zingers ... okay just a teeny bit terrified.
Kid: Mom, who made sex?
Me: God. And it is awesome!
Kid: No way! Ewww
Me: Right Dad? Am I right?
Dad: Yep, He did. And yep it's awesome!
Kid: ~gapping mouth and wide eyes~
Me: Anymore questions....?
Kid: Did I come from your tummy, Mom?
Me: No, Buddy. You were in another mommy's tummy first. And while you were in there He knew that you needed a mommy to care for you. And He picked me.
Me: God. And it is awesome!
Kid: No way! Ewww
Me: Right Dad? Am I right?
Dad: Yep, He did. And yep it's awesome!
Kid: ~gapping mouth and wide eyes~
Me: Anymore questions....?
Kid: Did I come from your tummy, Mom?
Me: No, Buddy. You were in another mommy's tummy first. And while you were in there He knew that you needed a mommy to care for you. And He picked me.
Kid: Mom, would you miss me if I died?
Me: I wouldn't even want to keep on living. I would hurt so much and miss you so much. And maybe never stop crying.
Kid: But you have #1 and #2 and #4. You don't need me.
Me: Oh I need you, sweet one. You are part of me. It would be like a part of me died.
Kid: Hey Mom, what is --- ? Everyone's talking about it at school.
(thank You President Clinton and Ms. Lewinsky, thank you very much)
Me: ~overwhelming sadness that this would now be our world,
way before it should be AND
serious elation that I was being trusted enough to be asked
Celebrate the wins!!~
Me: I wouldn't even want to keep on living. I would hurt so much and miss you so much. And maybe never stop crying.
Kid: But you have #1 and #2 and #4. You don't need me.
Me: Oh I need you, sweet one. You are part of me. It would be like a part of me died.
Kid: Hey Mom, what is --- ? Everyone's talking about it at school.
(thank You President Clinton and Ms. Lewinsky, thank you very much)
Me: ~overwhelming sadness that this would now be our world,
way before it should be AND
serious elation that I was being trusted enough to be asked
Celebrate the wins!!~
These, my friends, are just a very few samplings of some very real questions that this mama has been asked. Some times they have come out of the blue. Some times I've seen 'em coming. Sometimes they have taken me off guard while driving down the road and made me very sad. It’s sad when your little ones learn about brokenness. It’s sad when they struggle with very, very heavy things at very, very young ages. It's sad when the beautiful gift of sex and intimacy has been misinterpreted and abused.
But when it happens - when they throw a zinger at you - know you’re not alone.
You might answer it wrong at first or get defensive or get all judgy about something.
Relax, we all get judgy sometimes.
You've already judged me in the middle of this and I'm good with it.
It’s okay to pause. It’s okay to say I’ll get back to you about that one. It’s okay to say let’s figure it out together.
Or... it's okay to sit down and cry.
Relax, we all get judgy sometimes.
You've already judged me in the middle of this and I'm good with it.
It’s okay to pause. It’s okay to say I’ll get back to you about that one. It’s okay to say let’s figure it out together.
Or... it's okay to sit down and cry.
